I often receive many email invitations to courses around becoming empowered, making it to the top and leaving a legacy. In the past several years, my journey has been one of a conscious apprenticeship with loss. I have learned an enormous amount from this journey and it has been incredibly empowering. It has inspired a book which I recently completed. This journey has birthed forth a deep awareness of a cultural shadow of 'making it to the top.' Whether it is financially, spiritually, or socially. This cultural shadow seems to foster envy, greed and competition. It can keeps us isolated and separated from each other. What about making it to the bottom? Rooting into the depths of our inner Nature, the sacred Earth. Finding the sacred unity in the heart of Nature which unites us all. What happens when we step off the vertical ladder?
About a year and a half ago, I gave a massage to man at Jackson Wellsprings. He had just gotten back from India. My first thought was that he was with his guru-striving towards the pinnacle of realization at the top. When I touched him, I felt an enormous wellspring of grief arise within me. I asked him, “Where have you been?” He said he had been working with children in one of the worst brothels in India. As we continued with our bodywork session, I felt as if I was receiving the children. I could see their faces and feel the horror and grief of their circumstances. The session moved me deeply. It felt like a profound blessing.
At the end of the session he said, “I don’t know if I made a difference in those childrens’ lives.” I immediately said, “Of course you did.” He replied, “No, I really don’t know. They are used to having people come and go. I know they sure got into my heart and changed my life.”
I think about that session a lot. I continue to learn from the honesty, rawness and realness in this exchange. What if we truly don’t know how our actions affect each other? What happens if we let go of trying to leave a legacy, being a hero and making it to the top? If we could truly not know but find the radical courage to let suffering crack our hearts open into deeper compassion and love. What can be revealed then? It is not everyone's dharma to work in brothels. What happens if we let loss into our hearts? If we allow the suffering to crack our hearts open? What happens if we are stripped of a hero’s agenda but flow with the uncertainty of a cracked open love? What wants to find space in your heart today?
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For those who would like to receive healing support, I am offering a special which is redeemable until mid. February. I am offering series sessions for $200 for 3--90 min sessions or 5--90 min. sessions for $330. If you are curious of my work and haven't received a session, I am offering an introductory 90 min. session for $65.
Much love and many blessings,
Courtney
About a year and a half ago, I gave a massage to man at Jackson Wellsprings. He had just gotten back from India. My first thought was that he was with his guru-striving towards the pinnacle of realization at the top. When I touched him, I felt an enormous wellspring of grief arise within me. I asked him, “Where have you been?” He said he had been working with children in one of the worst brothels in India. As we continued with our bodywork session, I felt as if I was receiving the children. I could see their faces and feel the horror and grief of their circumstances. The session moved me deeply. It felt like a profound blessing.
At the end of the session he said, “I don’t know if I made a difference in those childrens’ lives.” I immediately said, “Of course you did.” He replied, “No, I really don’t know. They are used to having people come and go. I know they sure got into my heart and changed my life.”
I think about that session a lot. I continue to learn from the honesty, rawness and realness in this exchange. What if we truly don’t know how our actions affect each other? What happens if we let go of trying to leave a legacy, being a hero and making it to the top? If we could truly not know but find the radical courage to let suffering crack our hearts open into deeper compassion and love. What can be revealed then? It is not everyone's dharma to work in brothels. What happens if we let loss into our hearts? If we allow the suffering to crack our hearts open? What happens if we are stripped of a hero’s agenda but flow with the uncertainty of a cracked open love? What wants to find space in your heart today?
*********
For those who would like to receive healing support, I am offering a special which is redeemable until mid. February. I am offering series sessions for $200 for 3--90 min sessions or 5--90 min. sessions for $330. If you are curious of my work and haven't received a session, I am offering an introductory 90 min. session for $65.
Much love and many blessings,
Courtney
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